#But I don't think GUN would ever not be on the 'good guys' team in a game about aliens invading the entire earth.

[not-the-conversation-starter]

The GUN Soldiers are not exactly depicted as the good guys, they're depicted as the army fighting the aliens invading the earth. Literally anyone doing that is the good guys, such as Eggman's robots in certain levels. In the very beginning of the game there's a cutscene with Towers telling his soldiers to kill Shadow no matter what. This is partially because of his history with Shadow, but also because they didn't have any time to make it so the various enemies didn't attack you if you were working with them. (I know the exception, irrelevant)

This positions them as big dumb dumbs who happen to be fighting significantly worse guys during the events of the game. Who are still targeting you because they're also bad, following orders from an old man's irrational grudge. It's just never the hero thing to kill a guy fighting the aliens from hell who are blowing up random civilian cities. Not without like, an entire Ace Attorney sequence at least.

call me a conspiracy theorist but i wanna say that was def corporate tapping the devs on the shoulders like "hey you kinda made sonic and shadow too anti cop in sonic adventure 2. can you tone it down"

[skvaderarts]

You guys want to hear something really funny?

I've been slowly showing my almost 80 year old grandma Arcane recently and she absolutely adores Viktor and Jayce, but especially Viktor. She's made me replay the part where Viktor made his speech to Jayce when he stopped him from jumping in season one like 10 times, she loves the "I'm from the undercity" part, she started crying when he ran across that bridge, and she looked physically devastated when she thought he was going to step off that ledge after Sky died and kept quietly repeating "no no honey no" over and over again and looked away from the screen until Jayce showed up and she literally sighed in relief when they started talking. She's actively upset that she can't adopt child Viktor because she said, and I quote "He would have loved Legos" and "has such sad pretty brown eyes". She has started making jokes about the "wait, this isn't my bedroom" line when she goes places in our house (much to my mom's confusion because she hasn't seen the show yet and can clearly tell she's missing out on an inside joke because we keep laughing so hard about it) and every time that Jayce says "partners" she just goes "uh-huh" and laughs a little. It's deeply funny.

Well, tonight I made a joke on a discord call with a friend about Viktor and Jayce and I said "The question isn't IF their fucking it's who's fucking who" and my grandma, in the background, completely unprompted just said "Oh, Viktor is obviously the one taking charge in that situation. Look how he looks at him and touches him. Jayce is a puppy. He's gonna do whatever Viktor wants."

And I don't think I have ever laughed harder at anything she's ever said in my whole goddamn life. I didn't realize she was on team Jayvik THAT HARD LMFAO. My grandma is part of Viktor Nation.

W GRANDMA!

Side note:

She loves the soundtrack. She doesn't understand how music streaming works so I basically had to make a playlist that just plays What Could've Been, The Line, Remember Me, Blood, Sweat, and Tears, and Enemy on loop for her. She likes bass, what can I say lol! She has good taste. I expect nothing less from the woman who wants me to take her to a Hozier concert next year 😭 She also likes What Have They Done To Us and Guns for Hire but said she can't listen to them as often because it makes her too sad lol she's real for that.

... She also loves Isha... She doesn't know yet. She's gonna be so sad.

[autisticshadowthehedgehog]

OK Guys. I get the skepticism esp after the Knuckles disaster, but we also need to keep in mind "this is a trailer that won't spoil literally everything about the movie." ESPECIALLY in regards to GUN. They're not gonna put in the trailer "the military shot a little girl and that's why Shadow is mad so Sonic is going to never work with them ever." That's a great way to get parents to bring their kids to the theater, especially in America. (/s)

It's WAY more effective as a plot twist halfway through, where Sonic thinks that he's finally being accepted onto Earth via working with the government only to find out that they're exploiting him and Shadow the same. I can't guarantee this is gonna happen obviously but it's like a 90% chance just knowing how, like. writing works.

Esp considering the government has not had a good track record in the last two movies, I dunno if they'd do a heel-face turn into "actually they were always right" in the movie where a little girl needs to get shot by the government.

And I'm not gonna say "trust and form a parasocial relationship with a film director" but we should keep in mind that Jeff Fowler got his start working on Shadow's title game and has stated in interviews that he understands how important Shadow's backstory is to his character. Not to mention how the internet has been exploding the last two years with enthusiasm over this story actually getting shown onscreen, enough that a studio would fucking notice at the very least that this is what the people want. I can't guarantee they'll actually listen, but saying that they're absolutely not because "Sonic was in a GUN helicopter in the trailer" is insane. Especially with the fact that GUN is not with Sonic when he goes to Eggman. We just see Team Sonic alone meeting with Stone, and I will bet you it's because there's no way in hell GUN would let them near him, what with the Robotnik connections to the ARK.

Also the Gerald thing is rather worrying, esp with the lack of shit they gave Pachacamac in the miniseries, but honestly I think that was just a marketing push of "Jim Carrey will be playing TWO characters!!!" Considering he's only seen in one trailer scene AT the ARK (where all of Gerald's technology was and, more importantly, where the Eclipse cannon he needs someone to set off is) AND we know from movie 2's credits scene that there was a fifty-year timeskip, I severely doubt that's the real Gerald who's just completely unaffected by his granddaughter being murdered.

And ofc there's things to be concerned about in the trailer. The lack of Rouge for instance– I obviously keep posting my theory that Krysten Ritter's character will be her undercover but the fact we don't know how much time she'd actually have with Shadow, if at ALL, is worrying. The fact that Rouge might not be here period. The weird pacing of the Knuckles show and the fear that could bleed over into the movie. But there's also stuff to get excited about– the epic fight scene choreography, the brief glimpse we got of Maria and Shadow's bond. Reeves's voice actually fits Shadow and at least from what the trailer showed us it looks like the Green Hills storyline is taking a backseat to the action and mystery of Project Shadow.

tl;dr guys calm down for like five minutes. if the movie sucks in december we can riot then. right now let's just band together against mufasa

[arjudy224]

The Boys need help

Part 1- Alfred's new help

Alfred's New Help part 2

After a "random" attack on the Wayne family, the new maid may be more than what meets the eye.

Joker caresses the side of the young boy's face with a twisted smile. Tension spreads throughout his entire upper body. Dick notices how there is a slight shake in Damien's palms. After all this time, sometimes it is easy to forget how young Damien truly is. With his youthful round face and big blue eyes, Damien could fit in with your average middle schooler.... if you ignore the murder in his eyes.

"My Father used to say that-"

BANG!

The Joker crumbles to the ground surprising every member of the Wayne family. A small trembling figure is revealed slowly stepping out from behind the clown. Scanning the room for any other potential danger, Y/N reluctantly puts the safety back on.

"Are you guys okay?' Y/N's voice trembles before dutifully untying Bruce.

Five pairs of eyes stare at her in painful silence.

"Where did you get that?" Damien questions breaking the silence.

Making her way down the line, Y/N starts working on Tim's restraints next.

"Alfred stashed a few in case something like this happened. I never thought I would ever need it... Until a van full of clowns passed me on the highway this morning."

An unexpected smile appears on Damien's face. Jason and Dick share a long look. Jason shrugs. Bruce's unreadable gaze suddenly makes her defensive. Before untying Jason, Y/N kicks the Joker. A wheezy laugh echoes across the room. At the pure shock staring back at her, she defends "It's not like I killed him or anything. Have you guys never heard of stand-your-ground laws?"

Jason starts to chuckle to himself. Looking past the horrified reactions of his family to his unlikely savior, he flashes her a grateful smile. Patting her on the back, he says

"Well' I don't know about the rest of them, but I'm sure glad you were here. That was badass."

Sharing an unreadable look with Dick, it doesn't take very long for the rest of the family to snap out of their stupor. Tim and Damien team up to tie up the clown prince of crime while Dick gags him. Once the team realizes it wasn't a lethal shot, jokes run wild.

"Listen, I'm just saying you'll never see Y/N and Deadshot in the same room..." Dick jokes playfully shoving the girl.

"Please if Y/N's skill set resembled any vigilante, it would be Nightwing." Tim continues with a wink.

"Y/N would be great at bow staff, but I sincerally doubt that Nightwing could do colorguard." Jason jokes.

"Ladies. Ladies. You may be right, but my ass would not look as good in the uniform." She interjects, "Man's definitely got me beat there.

"Debatable," Jason comments under his breath.

Dick smacks him lightly on the arm.

Bruce offers the young girl a cold glass of water while steering her away from all the chatter. Y/n gratefully takes it.

"Are you alright?"

Y/n nods slowly.

Bruce's gaze meets hers. It's easy to see why people consider him a playboy. His eyes have the ability to make you feel completely and utterly seen.

"Thank you for protecting my family."

Melting under his earnest gaze, Y/N glances toward the 3 boys dragging Jason away from the Joker. Past the Billionaire heartthrob lies a wearied Father in constant fear of losing his family... again.

"I'm sorry I know you don't like guns. I didn't like the way he was looking at Damien."

Bruce sighs putting a hand on her shoulder. The wrestling brothers draw their attention back to the front of the room.

"I had to do it for old times' sake. Come on!" Jason protests with a smug grin as Tim and Dick drag him away.

Winking at Y/N, Jason weakly waves as the boys leave the room.

A parade of red and blue flashing lights interrupts the show.

Alfred slips into the room wordlessly.

"Master Bruce, Detective Gordan would like a word."

Y/N gasps in surprise.

"Where have you been?"

Alfred stays silent for a moment.

"Who do you think dealt with his goons?"

Batman and Gordon:

In the corner of the room watching the group of young men teasing Y/N, Batman and Gordan exchange glances.

Gordon cracks a smile.

"Seems like a good kid." Gordan

Batman stays silent observing the interactions unfolding before them.

"She has impeccable marksmanship for someone who has never been trained." Batman comments.

Gordon raises an eyebrow. Taking a sip of his coffee, he pauses.

"Are you insinuating something?"

"...No. It's an observation."

Tag list: @jjsmeowthie

[sanguineterrain]

for the dc prompts you reblogged:

can i request jason todd x reader "someone likes being pinned down" + A flirting with B while sparring to throw them off their tracks

where reader is also a vigilante??

thank you so much 🩷

very sexy prompts thank u 😌

jason todd x gn!reader. r and robin!jay were friends, r doesn't know jason is alive/red hood but jason knows r is a vigilante. r's alias is 'nocturne' (if that's already in use oh well lmao). fighting/sparring, jason is mega in love with you as usual!!

all fics at @sanguinelibrary

****

"Still blindly following the Bat, huh?"

You land in a crouch on the rooftop, just like how Nightwing taught you. The Red Hood doesn't look at you, digging through two duffel bags. He doesn't even draw his gun, like you've seen him do with virtually every other vigilante in Gotham.

You wait, ready to spring into action. But Hood doesn't stop what he's doing. Slowly, you rise.

"What... do you mean?" you ask.

"I mean, why are you traipsing around Gotham as a bat-adjacent? Who are you s'posed to be anyway? Goth Bat? Alternative Scene Bat?"

"I'm Nocturne," you say, shoulders rising to your ears. Rude. You thought the chunky boots and star over your suit's eye mask were inspired.

Red Hood lifts a hand. "Don't get me wrong, I dig the threads. I'm just surprised B didn't have an aneurysm over the sequins. Then again, Discowing did do it first..."

Your first two meetings with the infamous Red Hood have been similar in that he's never very concerned about you stopping him (ouch), but he also isn't callous or cruel with you like he is with the other vigilantes.

Case in point: the last person who cornered Hood on a roof was Red Robin. Hood shot him in the shoulder before he could land.

In short, he's perplexing as hell.

Batman's forbidden the rest of the team to confront Hood without backup. And you're technically not supposed to be on patrol tonight. But if you can intercept Hood, that'll be a huge win.

Hood keeps on packing the duffels. You hesitate, then step forward.

"Get away from the bags," you say. "I won't ask twice."

Hood looks at you. "Nocturne's a pretty cool name, I'll admit. And I like the boots. But I still think you oughta call it quits."

He zips up the bags, stands, and kicks them to the corner of the roof.

"Because you're just that unstoppable?" you ask, hands curling into fists.

"Yeah. But mostly 'cause I know you're made for so much more than this, sweetheart."

And that is the third and perhaps most bewildering thing about your encounters with Red Hood: you've gotten the creeping feeling that he... likes you.

Which is ridiculous, and if you ever breathed a word of that to anybody, Batman would probably check you into Arkham.

You take another careful step forward. Hood leans against the railing and folds his arms.

"This the part where you apprehend and hogtie me for innocently packing a duffel bag?" he asks.

You glare. "Innocent? I know you're making a weapons delivery because I know you've been waiting for Batman to be off-planet to make it."

"Clever. Told ya you're too good for this," Hood says. "Should be in college with those smarts, not playing maid for Batman."

"Are you lecturing me?"

"I'm advising you as your friendly neighborhood drug lord. Lecturing makes me sound like a guy who's got too much money and too big of a savior complex to understand that the way he fights injustice is fundamentally flawed."

"Sounds personal."

Hood laughs. "Honey, you have no idea."

You strike.

Hood parries your first attack easily, which you expect. The truth is that whoever trained Hood cut no corners and you're still relatively new at vigilantism. It's only by the grace of God that Hood hasn't left you to bleed out on a roof.

You kick his shin, but Hood turns on the instep and blocks. You go for his shoulder, where his armor separates to give him more movement. But Hood's ready for that too, and he catches your arm.

"Gotta keep that right arm up," he says. "Surprised no one's trained that outta you yet."

You elbow Hood in the throat. He coughs and lets go.

"Like that?" you ask, muscles tense with adrenaline.

Hood makes a sound that might be a laugh, still choked from your hit. "Just like that, honeylove. Good job."

"I don't need feedback," you snap, immediately going back in for another hit.

"Sorry. I'll make this quick then. I do have a delivery."

On the next strike, you advance, using a technique Nightwing drilled into your head for bigger opponents. Hood goes down and you land atop him.

"Oh, that's a Nightwing takedown if I've ever seen one," Hood says beneath you.

You're close enough that you can hear his breathing through the decoder. Pride swells in you at taking him down. Not even Batman has managed such a thing.

Hood is warm and big. His shoulder span alone dwarfs you. When you'd seen him from afar, fighting Batman or Nightwing, you'd been terrified.

But now, perhaps stupidly, you feel comfortable. Annoyed, but safe. Something about him reminds you of home. Makes your stomach flip in a good way.

Which is terrifying.

"You're coming with me," you say, reaching for your cuffs.

"If only. Unfortunately, you've forgotten a teensy weensy detail, dearest."

Hood bucks you off, legs first. Your feet fly into the air, which allows him to flip your positions. You wince, preparing for a concussion upon impact as you go down. But Hood cushions your fall and neatly rolls you over. Your back is pressed into the concrete, hands locked over your head. Hood's weight holds down your hips and legs.

He looms over you, easily holding you down. Your face grows hot.

"How did—" You squirm in his grip. "I had you!"

"Weight distribution, sweets. Tell Al—one of the Bats to add weight to your boots. They keep you light on your feet, but you were depending on them too much to hold me down, and we ain't evenly matched there."

You thrash in his grip. "Hood, I swear to fucking—"

"Easy. Don't sweat it, sweetheart. You haven't been doing this for very long. That was a good takedown, regardless. I'm impressed."

"Screw you."

He hums. You can tell he's smiling under the helmet. "Sorry, I forgot. You don't like feedback."

Hood strokes the inside of your wrist. You aren't sure he's aware he's doing it. His grip is firm but light. He's not trying to hurt you. Your pulse is in your throat.

For a moment, you're both still. Hood seems caught in a trance, like even Superman couldn't tear him away from this moment. From you. And it's not that you're afraid, you're just... you're...

"How do you know so much about me?" you blurt, because it's puzzled the whole team. "You been spying on me?"

"'Course not. Unlike your boss, I respect privacy. No, I did research. I recognized you from when you'd hang around that second Robin. Shrimpy little guy. What'd ya even see in him?"

The grief overtakes you before you can control your mouth.

"You don't know anything about me or him," you spit. "Don't fucking talk about him. He had more skill and goodness in his pinkie than you'll have in a lifetime. And you could learn a thing from him about changing a city. He'd tell you that fear alone never works."

Hood is quiet for a long moment. Then he speaks.

"Where's your distress signal?"

"Why would I tell—"

Hood shifts over you, cutting off your reply. He pulls a ziptie around your wrists. They're not even a little tight. You could probably slip out of them if you had five minutes.

"I know you're not s'posed to be out tonight," he whispers in your ear. "'S not your patrol night. Good thing you're my favorite."

You nearly swallow your tongue. "How do you—I don't—"

"Uh-huh. So you be good from now on, yeah? Wouldn't wanna have to keep tying you up like this."

You lift your chin. "We'll switch positions soon enough."

Hood snorts. "Okay, I know you heard how that soun—"

"I heard it," you say grumpily. "Just get on with it. Jerk."

"As you wish. Distress signal?"

"Collar."

Hood presses the button under your collar. Your breath hitches as his gloved fingers graze your neck.

"Oh? Does somebody like getting pinned down?"

"In your dreams."

Hood laughs. He zipties your ankles last, then sits you upright against the railing.

"Not too tight, are they?" he asks. "I know you've got a circulation problem."

You squint. "You seem to know a lot about me. Not fair that I don't know much about you, Hood."

"'S just business, honeylove," he says, scooping up his duffel. "Now I don't wanna see you in a suit anymore, comprende?"

"Or you'll what? Shoot me?"

Hood pauses, eerily still. He turns those glowing white eyes upon you. Your heart picks up.

"No," he says, so serious it startles you. "But someone else might. And I don't want you to face the same fate as your good friend Robin."

He vaults over the railing before you can respond. Your head thunks lightly as you lean back and wonder if you're really just business to the Red Hood.

(pt 2)

[celestialgalaxyglow]

Batfam and Danny, Part 42

Late evening, Jason and Roy's house in the Gotham suburbs.

Jason, Roy, and Danny were peacefully watching TV when they heard the door bell ring.

Roy: Who could that be at this hour?

Jason (grabbing his gun and moving towards the door): I'll get it.

Jason cautiously walked over to door, hiding his gun behind his back. Jason got to the door and looked through the peephole.

Jason: The hell?

Jason put his gun down and opened the door. Standing at door was Damian teary eyed.

Damian: Akhi!

Damian ran up to Jason and hugged him.

Jason (hugging Damian): Hey buddy, got into argument with dad?

Damian: Yeah...

Jason: He grounded you?

Damian: Yeah...

Jason: Did you tell anyone you came here?

Damian: Alfred knows.

Jason: Ok, let's get you warmed up, it's a cold evening.

Jason got Damian settled in, Roy made Damian some hot cocoa, and Danny prepared the guest room for Damian.

Roy: Fell better?

Damian: Yes, thank you silf.

Roy: Silf?

Damian: It means brother-in-law. I could also use zawj al-akh, literally meaning my brother's husband, but that's too wordy.

Roy (blushing): Husband?

Damian: You two are basically married.

Jason (blushing): Damian you can't just-

Roy: No, it's ok, I don't mind.

Danny: What would I be?

Damian: Ibnu al-akh. And Lian would be ibnatu al-akh. Is she already alseep?

Roy: Yeah, it's well pass her bedtime.

Jason: So what happened?

Damian: Baba got mad that I took my sword on patrol...

Jason: Akhi.

Damian: Don't you "akhi" me! That sword is part of me, part of my soul!

Jason: And my guns are part of my soul, but I don't take them on patrol when I go with you guys. Dad's team, his rules.

Damian: It's not fair!

Jason: Just be happy he let's you take your sword when you're out with Jon.

Damian: I might have overreacted running away...

Jason: You think?

Damian: 80% chance I did.

Jason: You're so silly, don't ever change Dami.

Damian (looking at Jason closely): You look different. Taller?

Jason: Yeah I thought I was going to stay 6' 6" but these last few days I've grown to be 6' 9".

Roy: I have mixed feelings about it, I used to be one inch taller, but now I'm two shorter.

Jason: Oh please you love it.

Roy: Fine I do, I love my tall bf.

Damian: So that's why baba has been in a mood lately, he's grumpy that you've gotten taller.

Jason: He always grumpy. The man wears eye shadow daily, like it's a fashion statement or something.

Damian (laughing): Baba is so silly.

Jason: That he is. But don't take your sword on patrol again or dad will send you to military school.

Damian: Jon will break me out.

Jason: Dad will send Jon to military school.

Damian: There's no way Clark or Lois will ever agree to that, even if they agree, Jon would die in military school.

Jason: Don't underestimate Jon, he grew up on a farm, if anything he'll becoming the new commanding officer of the whole school.

Damian (laughing): 50-50 chance.

Jason: Ok, enjoy your hot cocoa, and wash up, your tooth brush is in the cabinet behind the mirror.

Roy: It is?

Jason: Wherever Damian and Bruce got into a fight Damian spent the night at my apartment so I always have an extra brush for him.

Roy: Ah.

Jason: So wash up and go to bed.

Damian: Bed?

Jason: It's late, you should be sleeping.

Damian: What about Danny?

Jason: He's also heading to bed.

Danny: Damn it. Well I'll go wash up, good night.

Danny left the room.

Jason (ruffling Damian's hair): Don't worry bud, just enjoy your cocoa, and I'll tuck you in when you're done.

Damian (smiling): Thank you akhi.

(Master Post)

I used this site to get some of the Arabic terms (link)

[yayasvalveplay]

Amnesiac Megatron in TFA!! That would be so fun!!!

Like maybe Starscream was actually able to do something effective for once and figured he actually did kill Megatron and now has full command over the Decepticons.

Meanwhile Megatron is missing most of his armor and a lot of his memories, maybe the last thing he remembers is his old life as a miner named D-16, and that's how Optimus and his repair crew find him. So of course they welcome him aboard and he becomes a valued member of their crew.

But a member they have to hide whenever contacting Autobot High Command or going to Cybertron.

And then, after the key is used to fully repair D-16, he gets his memories back as Megatron - but also remembers his time as D-16 the Repair Bot. That's gotta be awkward in a lot of ways.

From there Megatron has to make a decision - take back command of the Decepticons or pretend he isn't Megatron and stay with the small team of repair bots-

Oh who is he kidding? He's going to try and have both, especially when he remembers those long nights in Optimus's quarters, comforting him after a session of disparaging remarks and "Don't be a hero, it's not in your programming" from Ultra Magnus.

Optimus: Can we keep him?

Bumblebee: We kept Prowl

But yes. OMG you guys Your ideas are so good!!!

Starscream did succeed, letting Lockdown whip his memorys just in case . And now all megatron remembers is being D-16 a miner on Cybertron. And has to learn through Ratchet and Op that Warbuilds like himself have been kicked off of Cybertron.

"So I have no where to go?"

"Well unless you come with us. This ships big enough for one more passenger."

And he becomes apart of the crew. Having to stay hidden or off world when they go to Cybertron, and hide when they are expecting a call. For 600 years they go like this. Op and Dee falling for one another, Dee finding his spark beats for poetry that he loves to write about his found family (most being op) And fighting. He teaches the bots how to defend themselfs and gets Prowl to open up more. Sibling moments between them, Bee, and Bulkhead.

Now we all know that the stasis pods are relatively small, there's only like one larger pod for Bulkhead,

"So what happens if an emergency does happen? and we must go into stasis."

"You could go out the airlock. You are a flight frame."

"But lets hop it doesn't ever come to that."

Only for it to come to that when Starscream adorbs the ship looking for the allspark.

"LORD MEGATRON!!!!"

" You have the wrong bot con."

"Oh, guess that memory gun wiped you a bit to far back. No matter prepare to die,, again."

Of course Megatron has a semi hard time getting him out, and seeing as they were decending does the only thing he can think of. He's husrt. Starscream hurt him more his plating was still damaged despite the repairs.

Sending them both to their dooms.

Both heads were found by a young Sumdac.

And Op had to go into stasis thinking he'll never see Dee ever again. Everyone was. They all thought of him as apart of the family, he was the glue that held them together. And now he was gone, and they were stuck on this organic planet.

[jelloapocalypse]

If warner bros. forced you to at gun point, how would you try and make the dumb Hanabara cinematic universe that scoob tried to start?

This is kind of a hail mary, but I think the best way to pull this off would be to use that Jellystone show that came out a little while ago, which is set in the Yogi Bear universe. I heard that was pretty good? Above average for HB cartoon stuff, anyways, and I know it had a lot of characters from their properties crossing over.

This version of the plan assumes you asked me this question like 8 years ago. My plan would be to attempt to generate a weird, devout following for that show by putting a bizarre amount of effort and money into it. Try to aim for that Friendship is Witchcraft craze online, but obviously not to that degree since that's never happening again ever. But like... maybe 5% of that. Make that your goal so weird, amiable nerds are super into your show and want to get into the lore. Those guys are going to be your ambassadors.

After a season or two of this version of Jellystone is fully established, try to build hype online with mid-sized cartoon YouTubers doing tie-ins and making hour-long videos like "JELLYSTONE IS ACTUALLY AMAZING?!". Hopefully these will generate somewhere in the 100-300k view range and generate word of mouth to more everyday cartoon fans.

It's critical during this time period that there's an official YouTube channel uploading Jellystone episodes in full FOR FREE. You need to have a double digit number of shit up there for everyone to watch. And then you need to have an easy place they can go online to pay money to watch the rest. IT CANNOT BE A SERVICE NO ONE WILL USE LIKE PEEBO PREMIUM+ OR SOME SHIT. But make it accessible enough that a good number of people interested will actually buy the show to watch it instead of pirating it.

Use Bluey's social media team and presence online as a guide. They do a really good job of this.

Once this has all been done, it's time to bring Scooby-Doo into this. Have a tie-in TV movie that runs all the time on Cartoon Network. It's not going to make you a lot of money, but kids are going to watch it when they're home from school. (Do kids watch TV anymore? This is operating on the assumption they still do this like I did in 2004 so maybe this advice sucks. Skip this advice if it sucks.)

Have Scooby and the gang become regulars on Jellystone and do your best to continually create tie-in work. Scooby is going to be your powerhouse to introducing other CHILDREN to Jellystone's universe.

Then once you start making money and you've got 3+ seasons of Jellystone working under your belt, you might maybe be able to launch a side show with someone like Blue Falcon provided he and Dinomutt have already made appearances in Jellystone and people like them. This spin-off will not be that popular but it's fine. You can sell toys.

Keep Scooby as Scooby. Scooby still does his own shows. It's the most popular and recognizable series you've got. You don't want to change that or force the Jellystones in there outside of cameos.

THIS is when you make the SCOOB movie. And the tie-in characters all need to be characters from Jellystone. You can have one or two new ones. I'd say Dick Dastardly can still be your villain. Jellystone should have generated some level of hype by this point so there will be a nonzero number of people going to see the SCOOB movie because of that, and this movie is in theaters so at least a few moms and normies will be introduced to Jellystone through this.

After that, the EU can putter along and generate toy revenue for another six seasons or so if you're really lucky and probably one more spinoff show that kind of sucks provided Scooby has a tie-in movie to remind people your universe exists every two years or so.

That's the best I got.

[signedkoko]

Hi hi!

How would Striker, Bee, and poly Stolitz (romantic) react to their chubby s/o being very physically strong and working out a lot?

No pressure to write this, and If you don't write for this many characters, you can choose who to focus on!

Sending lots of love your way 💚💛💙

-🐻

Beelzebub | Blitzo & Stolas | Striker [Romantic]

In which you are considerably physically stronger than them, and work out plenty to match.

Naturally, all of the sins are extremely strong in comparison to any overlord or sinner

Even so, you were surprisingly up there, without her magic Beelzebub couldn't begin to carry half the weight you did, and usually had to resort to her larger form- or just asking for your help

It's part of why she found you so attractive, it felt like in some way you could protect her more than anyone she knew

A lot of the people around her were already small, so it was also nice that you compared to her in size, though she found you to be much more curvaceous than her own lanky figure

" Ugh. I'd kill for hips like these, babe. "

She loves to feel you up and down and hold you close because god, you are just sooo comfortable

And when you flex your muscles it drives her crazy! She thinks you're the hottest person she's ever met

She also may be partially to blame for your chubbiness, because she never stops feeding you sweets, oops!

Both of these fools are physically WEAK, however strong they might be with guns or magic

They recall their first encounter with you was when someone was making fun of Stolas for dating an imp, and you totally rocked their shit with a punch straight to the face

Blitzo is already on you, asking so many questions about who you were, why you did that, making jokes

And Stolas has a faint blush because god, that was so attractive

They kept inviting you over until eventually you were closer than most- present on every date, called by the same sweet nicknames

Stolas likes to go with you when you work out, he especially loves to see you boxing

Being able to cheer you on against an opponent, or imagine you protecting him- oh it was just so exciting

Blitzo enjoys walking around hell with you because he gets to see everyone fuck off

Scary dog privileges

Stolas is always squishing your cheeks and hugging you tightly while speaking of all his fantasies involving you both

Blitzo is sneaking pictures of you after workouts for his office

Stronger? Than him? Sure thing

Striker first heard it at a place he frequented for drinks, that there was a guard for hire poster put up on their bulletin, someone new

When he hired you to see what'd happen, you sweeped the floor of some royals security team in minutes, and all he had to do was pull the trigger

Admittedly, he didn't feel the need to work with you more than that, as he enjoyed the hunt as much as the kill

But it was certainly fun seeing what someone else pulled

He’s straightforward about that, but also admits that he'd like to keep in touch

OBVIOUSLY so he can hire you on tougher missions, not because he thought you were interesting or fun

Suddenly, he's always popping up in the places you go, always offering you a drink, always getting tipsy enough to invite you to dance

Oh yeah, he certainly wants you

Fortunately for him, you're his lovely significant other only a few weeks later

He enjoys practising sparing with you, though he usually loses with just strength to strength, hsi wits certainly make him a tougher opponent

Striker find your resolve fiery, and something about you ignites something in him that leaves him wanting more

Author's Note - Actually love these guys sm... good crew you chose bear non I respect it!

Also I CATCH all the love you sent my way and EAT IT 🖤

[novankenn]

(In the Spirit of @howlingday's RU-JA-GUN-CON, and my own Jaune Gets a Gun Au I present... )

"Jaune Gets An Upgrade AU" Day One - (Entrenching Tool)

Ren was still brooding over his newly acquired ability to become a waifu... and was seriously annoyed at Jaune's complete acceptance of that strange fact. While in the back of his mind the true fear about what Nora would do if she ever found out.

Jaune: SO...

Ren: No.

Jaune: But...

Ren: I said no. You are not going back for that dagger thing...

Jaune: I guess. Well we do have these new bracelets, and I think...

Ren: Don't say it. Don't even think of it.

Jaune: Come on Ren. It's a cool ability, that NO one else has!

Ren: It's a inane ability that makes no logical sense!

Jaune: Gee, for a guy who keeps spouting things about being open minded, you sure have a closed view on the whole gender-swap thing.

Ren: ...

Jaune: I wonder how the girls are making out in the firearms section?

Ren: Probably better than we are... and seeing as I haven't heard and screams of terror or explosions...

Jaune: Then Nora and Pyrrha are keeping team RWBY under control.

Ren: Is it weird that it's team RWBY and not Nora we're concerned about causing destruction?

Jaune: Ah, I mean they did blow up the docks and cause millions of lien in damage fighting a mech.

Ren: It was a stolen Atlas Paladin.

Jaune: Right. A mech.

Ren: ...

A pair of figures in the distance causes Jaune to stop in mid stride. Ren notices this and also stops.

Ren: Jaune?

Jaune: I think... is it?

Ren: Is what? Do you see someone you know?

Jaune: It couldn't be... but it has to be.

Ren: Ah... Jaune?

Jaune: It IS!!! Aunt Sally 674735-Arc and Uncle Sam 668843-Arc! Over here!

Ren's brain paused, and then crashed as a pair of very similar looking figures turned to face them. To him, they booth looked exactly the same...

(Images copied from https://warhammeruniverse.com/death-korps-of-krieg/)

Aunt Sally: Jaune!

Uncle Sam: Nephew!

Jaune jogged up to the pair of figures a huge smile on his face, leaving a still bewildered Ren flat footed and behind.

Jaune: Why are you guys here? Last I heard you were deployed to the out reaches to breach a Heretic base?

Aunt Sally: Vacation Days, so we thought we'd come visit some family.

Uncle Sam: We're due back in about a week.

Jaune: Well Mom is going to be thrilled that you're here! Does she know?

Uncle Sam: No. We haven't told her yet. We want it to be a surprise.

Jaune: I won't tell a soul.

Aunt Sallyy: So why are you here, Jaune?

Jaune: I'm here to find an alternate weapon to Crocea Mors.

Uncle Sam: Why?

Jaune: Well.. um...

Aunt Sally: Does your mom know you are in Vale?

Jaune: Well...

Uncle Sam: Jaune?

Jaune: I sort of ran from home to attend Beacon, and borrowed Crocea Mors... WHICH I want to send back, so I need to find something else to serve as my main weapon.

Jaune fidgeted, and by the time Ren finally reset his thoughts and joined him, Jaune looked like he was about to burst into tears, under the stern gaze of the pair of gasmask wearing individuals. At least Ren thought it was a stern gaze. To be honest he really couldn't tell.

Aunt Sally: You're mom has to be worried sick. I suggest you CALL her very soon...

Uncle Sam: Preferably before we visit her and tell her were we saw you. Understand?

Jaune: Yes, and I promise to call her as soon as I finish here.

Uncle Sam: Good boy, now as for a replacement for Crocea Mors... not that much could ever replace such a honorable and venerable blade...

Aunt Sally: How about this?

Ren: That's a... shovel?

Aunt Sally / Uncle Sam / Jaune: HERESY!!!

Ren: huh?

Jaune: That's not a SHOVEL!

Aunt Sally: It's a Munitorum Mk III Sapper Shovel! An intrinsic and iconic part of the Death Korps of Krieg kit of battle!

Ren: Death Korps?

Uncle Sam: Is your friend a heretic?

Jaune: I don't think so? Ren you're not a Heretic disguised as my friend are you?

Ren: ...

[interlagostrack]

my ranking of the 2025 f1 lineups

ferrari - hamilton/leclerc there isn't much to explain here: lewis is the best and most complete driver to ever compete in f1, and even if he is not at his best, he's still better than the rest of the grid and that's it. charles is exceptional and with a little bit of luck and a car he can trust, he can prove once and for all he is the best driver of his generation.

mclaren - norris/piastri as much as it pains me to admit it, right now, mclaren is the strongest team on the grid. i always liked oscar, i know he is an amazing driver and i think lando turned out better than i expected this year (he still needs to mature a bit). both lack consistency tho.

redbull - verstappen/lawson i put them in 3rd place because yeah, we know if max has a fast car he can (put the other drivers on the wall and) deliver some results. i'm curious how they'll be this year, since they lost some key players last year, especially newey. i don't think lawson will be too hot, he might be just the next driver to have his career ruined by rbr.

mercedes - russell/antonelli i honestly believe george is one of the fastest drivers on the grid and he's also a clean driver who's not afraid to take risks BUT i don't trust mercedes to develop a car that's consistently fast (especially without lewis' input). kimi is a prodigy but i fear toto is screwing up his career by making him skip f3 and not letting him do another year of f2. his 2024 was of highs and lows and he would probably benefit of more time, but oh well

williams - albon/sainz here we have two reasonably good drivers on a reasonably good team and that's it?. like, i don't mean to be offensive, but i look at this team and all i think of is "mid" (and that if williams manages to give them a decent car and they manage to not crash every couple of laps)

haas - ocon/bearman i really like this duo! esteban is one of my favorite drivers and i do hope he finally has an opportunity on a team that supports him and recognizes his talent. oli already proved he is talented enough with all the times he was called to replace a driver last year, and i think a midfield team will be better for his first full season than the pressure that will come antonelli's way.

sauber - hulkenberg/bortoleto as much as it pains me to admit, hulk had a pretty interesting season last year (in parts thanks to kmag, but i do admit he is a better driver this time around) and i like gabi, i think he has a lot of potential to develop on a midfield team, without so much pressure and he will benefit from a more experienced teammate (even if i think it will be a miracle if they manage to score points any time this year).

aston martin - alonso/stroll ok, so hear me out: i don't think lance is a disgrace to motorsports, as most fans like to make of him AND i don't think alonso is god's gift to f1 either. to me, lance is a pretty average driver, with some good moments, and alonso is an okay driver that got luck with his 2 titles and somewhow convinced the media he is a genius. at least lance seems like a nice guy. i don't think newey is enough to save this team btw and i don't care too much about them

racing bulls - tsunoda/hadjar i don't have much of an opinion on hadjar and i think yuki is too good for this team and he will crush another teammate. i also think we should give yuki a gun and let him alone with marko for 15 minutes.

alpine - gasly/doohan this will be a shit show, both are good drivers but i think there will be too much drama behind the scenes and not enough results on track because the car won't be good enough.

literally no one asked me, but i'd love to hear other opinions so my ask is open or whatever

[darcyfangirlsfrequently]

Live reactions to CM S18 ep1

AHHHHHHHHHH FINALLY IT'S TIMEEEEE MY HANDS ARE SHAKING

Starting off the season with a trigger warning is CRAZY we really aren't playing around

Oooh tricking the police into helping you get the guy into your car. smart.

CONCENTRATED HELLO KITTY I'M CRYING

AHHH THERE THEY ARE THEY'RE BACK ON MY SCREEEEEEN

Emily only introducing half the team is still weird to me

"Can you stop him?" * The Look * AHHHH WE'RE SO BACK

TYLER BADGEEEE (surprising absolutely no one lol)

the way I say the back of Tyler's head and immediately thought it was Luke---

"Trainee" AHHH I'M SO EXCITED FOR THIS DYNAMIC

LUKE QUIZZING HIM. BEING THE MENTOR. THE STUDENT BECOMING THE TEACHER. THE NEWBIE IS THE EXPERIENCED GUIDE AHHHHHH

Luke are you aware chairs exist??? Do you ever NOT sit on desks?

And again. Putting Luke and Tyler in near IDENTICAL outfits is crazy work and the costume dept. knows what they're doing.

JJ and Luke quizzing him I'm so excited I'm SO excited I'm loving this so much

"Are you kidding me with that?" LUKE 🤣🤣🤣

he just casually has a dagger??? Also get your foot off JJ's desk

JJ and Luke just looking at each other like "awww that's so cute"

Rossi maaaaaaaaaaaaaad

I'm glad Luke asked Tyler to define OPR bc I also want to know haha

So while yes I absolutely believe Rossi set up Voit's attack in prison that audio clip proves nothing other than Rossi giving him a head's up that he was in danger

PENELOPEEEE HI BABYGIRL YOU LOOK SO GOOOOOD

"You're here again" Penelope how often do you go to visit him??

JJ really looks so GOOD with straight hair

TARAAAA HI GIRL YOU LOOK SO GOOD

Wait... Will is still alive? We have to watch him die? Oh god

aerosolized fentanyl is a THING???

The way they're all bouncing off each other and figuring things out WE ARE SO BACK IT'S SO GOOD

I'm curious. Are these people who can't swim? is there smth weighing them down? why don't they try to swim to the edge of the pool to get out? Obviously he would still kill them but why don't they at least TRY??? Even if they were still drugged I think they would have the wherewithal to try

Poor Emily istg sometimes her job is making toddlers go down for their nap

Luke getting his smart boy moments!! Yay!!

AHHHH LUKE'S SMILE WHEN HE SEES PENELOPE THROUGH THE WINDOWWWW

"It is not demure or mindful" NO NOT THAT TREND 🤣

Penelope stop saying "yo"

Luke's soft little smile at her when they're all in her office spying on people. Secret Dating Garvez is SO REAL (yes I am still on my bullshit about that and I always will be)

Is Luke just... eating a lollypop? and more importantly did he get it from his gf Penelope

Yes indeedy!!!

I'm loving this friendship between Luke, Tyler, and Penelope as a trio I really am. And yes I think it's a product of Luke and Penelope feeling so secure in their relationship that they have no issues with being around and working with her ex-situationship

I know JJ was DYINNNNN to ask Pen about the luke/tyler situation

WOAAHHHH THE WHOLE FAMILY??

Not us getting the most Luke information we've ever gotten at once from his fucking DOG TAGS. We now know his blood type (O-) and that he still identifies as catholic

"Well... that's where I come in" YES IT IS BBG

Luke dear god the smiles each time you LOOK at her...

first look at the unsub!!

Oh he has a gun! Well that answers my question about why they don't try to escape.

What I want to know is: why these people? how does he make these selections?

ooh wait unrelated to everything but I bet the reason there's the scene this episode (i'm pretty sure) where Penelope is crying to luke "he thinks empathy is a sin" is bc she's talking to him about why she goes to visit Voit

Emily and Rossi playing "clue" 🤣🤣🤣

AHHH IT'S THE LIGHT BLUE LONG SLEEVE WHICH MEANS IT'S GARVEZ TIMEEEE

ohhh he's pissed

I WAS RIGHT FUCKING CALLED ITTTT

"I remember you taking off your glasses. It's how I knew you were serious." I can't with them he loves her so much he can just read her he knows her so well

"I don't see anything but I believe that you believe it." I literally cannot with how soft he is with her

HIS HAND IS ON HER LEG HIS HAND IS ON HER LEGGGGGG

AND SHE TOUCHED HIS HANDDDDD

secret dating garvez is SO real

"you know i never got heartburn before i met you" is that 50yo speak for "I love you but you stress me out" like how did he manage to say that SO romantically

"Can you run more than one search at a time?" he says with a fond smile that says he knows that she ABSOLUTELY can

"Science says asking a dumb question makes you less cute" WHAAAAAAT THE FUCK???? AND THEN HE POKED HER SHOULDER???

And then there's the almost cheek/head kiss we saw in the sneak peek. still mad he didn't give her a smooch but the rest of the stuff in this scene is making it very easy for me to get over it

Tyler's little grin when Luke says "you too." He's like "yay! i get to go do a big boy job!"

The mom trying to help her daughter stay alive as long as possible 😭😭😭

Oh my god them using the corpse of their husband/dad as a float to stay alive...

NO OMG THE CORKSCREW TO CUT A HOLE YESSS

No the unsub saw and the mom is shot 😭😭😭

Tyler using his dagger to open the cover!!!!!

@lklvz @mortalscience on a scale from 1-10 how insane were you when Luke dove into the pool and got soaking wet bc of it

I was like "why does luke have his jacket on all of a sudden..." oh. it's her dead husband taking her with him to heaven I see

OH SHE LET GO SHE'LL LIVE YAY

For any of y'all who said greencia was gonna happen again... fat chance with him being in Alabama.

*flash forward ten years later* Tyler rejoins the BAU and they're ALL still there. even rossi.

although the 10yr rule didn't apply to Reid, Garcia, JJ I think, even Luke since he only became an SSA when he joined the BAU

*sigh* penelope's gonna close that door and he's gonna kill the nurse isn't he

Yupppp called it

That was such a good fucking episode I can't even holy shit

[shadowsndaisies]

the hard deck: slow ride (pt 2)

wc: ~1k

synopsis: a glimpse through Jake's eyes

main masterlist

athena-verse master post

a/n: here is part 2!

Look, Jake knew he was a great pilot. He knew it before he got sent to Top Gun; he knew it after. And he knew it before he got invited to this special detachment. In order to be a great pilot, there is a certain level of intelligence involved, so yes, Jake would say he's a smart guy. Which is why he feels confident in saying something has happened between you and Bradley.

You were by far the best person Jake had ever met. Pilot or not, hands-down, you were the best. There was something about you. That was just so innately trustworthy. Something bold and clever. He could put his life in your hands and wouldn't doubt them for a second. It'll be a cold day in hell before he admits it out loud, but Natasha Trace was a close second; it's the only reason he didn't go completely territorial over your friendship, that, and the fact that Phoenix probably would've thrown him overboard if he had even tried.

Since your assignment to the Tophatters, Jake has found himself with plenty of time to get to know you. And while you mentioned some of the people you attended Top Gun with, usually Harvard and Yale, you never once mentioned Rooster. Yet, there was something about the way you were staring at him, the way you watched how he and Natasha interacted; it set off all kinds of alarms in his head. He made a joke with the kiss and tell, and while you denied it, he knew there was something you weren't saying.

He's starting toward the pool table but pauses; whatever the truth was, whatever was going on, Bradley Bradshaw did something that hurt you, that much was clear, and well, if there was one thing Jake excelled at, more than flying, it was pushing all the wrong buttons. He looks back at you, gripping the G&T he'd gotten you, knowing you'd drink a beer but never enjoy it. You're playing with the condensation; he can see how your chest moves with deep breaths. And he decides there's no reason to build a bridge that was on fire from the start.

He turns and walks up to the Juke, scanning the listing and then smirking when he finds what he wants, putting in a quarter and clicking the numbers. Then he turns back to the pool table, "Bradshaw!" he calls, and out of the corner of his eye, he sees you turn. Jake hands the beers off, one to Nat and the other three to Javi for the moment being. "As I live and breathe," he smirks, stealing the pool cue out of Bob's hands.

It's a dick move, he knows, but well, right now, that's who he needed to be.

"Hangman," Rooster greets, a slight head tilt, and his lip quirks. "You look… good," he concedes, and Jake smirks.

"Well, I am good, Rooster," Jake starts, lining up his shot, and like he'd done to you earlier, he makes eye contact with Rooster as he hits the ball. However, there is a distinct rise in testosterone; unfortunately, Rooster is not nearly as fun to flirt with as you are. "I'm very good. In fact, I am too good to be true," Jake smirks again.

"So," Payback calls, and Jake notices how you've begun to inch forward. "Anybody know what this special detachment is all about?"

"No, mission's a mission. They don't confront me," Jake is the first to answer as he lines up his next shot, splitting his vision between the pool table and you. You're still far enough to keep everyone from seeing you but close enough to likely hear what's being said, even over the sounds of the bar. "What I want to know," he continues, "is who's gonna be team leader?" he emphasizes the question while landing another ball in a pocket before standing and looking around the table. "And who's has what it takes to follow me?" Jake doesn't mean to linger on you, but it seems to have an okay reaction because you quirk a smile in challenge, as if asking what makes you think you won't be following me? And honestly, he probably would. He'd follow you anywhere if you asked him to.

"Hangman, the only place you'll lead anyone is an early grave," Rooster says lowly, and every Aviator around the table freezes.

Fanboy lets out a nervous laugh that Jake sure earns him a few glares, but his gaze doesn't move off of you; instead, he watches your shoulders tense, you bite your lip, and then he sees as you uncomfortably force yourself forward. He was a dick, he knew that, but he wasn't about to let you force yourself into this conversation when your feet weren't firmly on the ground.

Jake keeps the cocky smirk on his face and stands up straight before walking over to Rooster, "Well," he begins, looking Rooster up and down. "Anyone who follows you is just going to run out of fuel. But that's just you, ain't it, Rooster?" Jake quips. "You're snug on that perch, waiting for just the right moment… that never comes," Jake takes slow steps, getting in Rooster's face.

The chorus of the song Jake had typed in came on at the perfect time.

Slow ride… take it easy…

Jake smirks, "I love this song!"

Jake had moved to go back to the game. Still, vaguely, he's aware that you're now speaking to another aviator and that Phoenix and Rooster are talking about him.

"Well, he hasn't changed," Phoenix notes, and though she's being quieter, it's not quiet enough.

"Nope, sure hasn't," Rooster affirms.

"Check it out," Fanboy calls, nodding past the table, and everybody's attention shifts, "more patches."

"That's Omaha, Halo, Fritz, and shit, is that Harvard and Yale talking to Athena," Payback notes.

Rooster pauses, "Wait, Athena's here?"

...

everything: @butterfly-skinnylegend

athena’s tags: @omgbrianab @smoothdogsgirl @bazellawriz @sbrewer21 @inky-sun @djs8891 @rory-cakes

[docholligay]

So this is more of what I'm going to call, in the most middling way I can, a disproportionate response. War has gotten more complicated and in a lot of ways, shittier, since we stopped lining up in neat rows to kill each other.

You saw this fear on perfect display for the US in Vietnam, which is top of my mind right now because I'm reading a book about it. Not my time period for sure, I but I think it's fair to say that war has never been the same since, even if there were precursors in various rebellions/revolutions/choose your own adventure here that noted the way the world was tipping in terms of warfare.

It's an open question and I am FOR CERTAIN not the person to answer it, but I wonder if the massive uptick in PTSD in the post-Vietnam era isn't just (though almost certainly this as well) better diagnosis, but the fact that you are being asked to be a monster under the banner of heaven. If anyone can be a combatant, no one can be human, least of all you, and then you are left holding the bag where you realize you have been forced to destroy the good thing in you AND FOR WHAT? You debased yourself for nothing, for a system that doesn't care about you and a leadership that would do it again.

And you will NEVER EVER EVER know how many of the people you killed were 'enemy insurgents' or whatever the fuck ever and how many were innocent. And, that has to haunt you. I mean I guess it doesn't have to, we all process things differently, but I think it would haunt me EVEN IF I at the time believed it was them or me.

This is why I can't get with the Rambo, "If someone fucked with my family I would kill them" shit. First of all, have you ever been in like, a fight? Things happen real fast! Have you ever had a gun pulled? You get quiet real fast! IF, god forbid, I had to kill someone, WITH EVERY SINGLE JUSTIFICATION TO DO SO, I believe it would still haunt me.

So I'm team fuckin Marcoh here! You're looking at this situation and going, "hey guys, what if this is like, oh, I don't know, a lot more fucking indiscriminate than I thought it would be?" It takes an IMMENSE amount of courage to go, 'I was wrong. The institution I worked under and for, is wrong. The THING I HAVE DEDICATED MY LIFE TO IS WRONG." But sometimes you gotta! Let's me real, most of us won't even protest because we DON'T WANNA LEAVE THE HOUSE, we're AFRAID, and here Marcoh is BURNING HIS LIFE TO THE GROUND. I want to take a minute and say what a fucking DIFFICULT BOSS MOVE THAT IS. It is EXTREMELY easy for me to sit here and say, "Oh, obviously, I would never do this, I'm amazing and morally clear" but I know what it is like, to be up against the wall and be a coward. Not, obviously, on the level of dropping Agent Orange or the anime equivalent, but I think a minute to appreciate Marcoh's EXTREME courage here is warranted.

It is so easy to be a good person sitting in my warm house behind a computer.

Please read me before commenting or sending an ask! (i respect your right to be contrarian but bear in mind you’ve probably seen this anime 87 times and I am watching it virgin-style. Please be cool about this! QUICK LINK TO THE SPOILER-FILLED FUNTIMES DISCORD HERE.

[imagine-shenanigans]

I've got severe brain worms from @391780 's fic Into Your Veins, and now I'm thinking of all the different scenarios where the 141 are also monsters in the apocalypse. like. obsessively. Also fat/chubby reader because mmmmmm yaes <3

Also this is basically just rambles and ranting over ideas for like, however long this got i didnt actually check teehee

We already have vampire simon so I won't touch on that because that is Specifically Their Brain Worms but I can't stop laughing every single time over the sunflower seeds incident (and every other similar one).

//

Soap as a werewolf is soooooo funny to me. Like he's constantly in this battle of "Don't swallow don't swallow don't swallow" whenever he rips a zombie in half with his teeth in wolf form and then confusion as to why people would think he's possibly infected. "Wdym I'm infected I'm just a little guy. I'm so cute. I wouldn't ever do anything. Smiles." He can't cover distance like Ghost or Gaz can, and sure he doesn't have the same authority that Price does, but he's a damn good soldier, and he's got some of the most sheer brute force on the team. So when Price tells him to start scouting in an area for survivors, he does! He's very thorough, combs over the area with a precision that would make most soldiers weep with jealousy.

He ends up scenting reader before he sees them, watches their little house from a distance. He's not patient like Simon, but he does watch reader for awhile, watches them surviving, all on their own in this little plot of land. Ends up watching your plush hips sway as you set out the laundry to dry. He's mesmerized, as he watches the sweat drip down your skin while you reinforce a few of your traps, go over the house with a fine toothed comb. You can't see him in the shadows, but by god is he seeing you. (And your ass - god he can't stop staring.)

He's not nearly patient enough to wait, so he waltzes right up, thinking his charming smile and accent is enough to win him some brownie points. He's halfway through a pickup line, maybe, when you level a shotgun at his face, completely unamused.

He's in love.

You refuse to go with him, but Price gave him orders and there's no WAY he's letting you go, not after he's seen your thighs and imagined himself using them as earmuffs. Not after he's thinking of a cute domestic life, providing for you like a good mate, and look at how precious you are, threatening him and -

and you shoot him.

Right in the chest, and thank god for the fact that it takes more than a few bullets to kill him because he's tearing through his skin in an instant, bones cracking and sinew melding as he quickly drops into his wolf form (which, jesus christ he's fucking HUGE) to help ease some of the pain and kickstart his healing process. He snarls right in your face and snaps your damn gun in half with his teeth before he tells you he'll be back in a week. (later, he feels bad, certainly, but only for frightening you)

You freak out, because JESUS CHRIST WEREWOLVES ARE REAL TOO????

Johnny's back in a week as promised, after spending a few days in bed and eating anything he could get his hands on all while gushing about the pretty little soft thing he's bringing back. He even goes out of his way to bring you a gift!!! He hunts down a deer on the way through the woods near your home, bringing dinner so he can butcher it and you can cook it because of course he's bringing you back for practical reasons but if he's going to court you no you don't need to know that.

You're gone when he comes to the home, every last item packed away and shoved into the back of the car he'd seen you drive. He's furious that his hard work will go to waste, so he helps himself to the rest of what you've got in the house and decides to store everything away for when he's on his way back to base. Fights his urge to track you down only for long enough to be practical, and then he's on the hunt.

It doesn't take him long to find you - he can run faster than your car can go cautiously while trying not to attract attention from a horde of zombies, and even though he's living he doesn't attract the same attention from the freaks that you do in a car with a gun. He tracks you down in no time flat, smiling as he taps on your window where you're parked inconspicuously to catch a few minutes of sleep.

When you scream, he laughs and waves, threatens with one clawed hand to slash the tires if you don't come out. Practicality wins in this case, and he has a long talk with you about coming back with him. He's sure he's just about convinced you when you slap him, throwing something at him that has him howling in white-hot pain. He can hear your apologies through sobs as you push him and he tangles with whatever you've thrown at him, trying to get it off in a blind panic, and you've driven off before he can stop you.

When he finally has a moment to breathe, the damn thing off of him, he realizes you'd tied together a small net of necklace chains - silver. necklace chains.

He's as angry as he as endeared, really. It's a game now, of fetch, of tag, he's not sure - he just ends up changing pace, gently herds you back in the direction of the base like a cattle dog. You're furious when he finally pops your tires when you're a good two days away from the base, just hefts you up on a shoulder and pats your ass while he walks with you. He's so smug about it too, and by all accounts, he's won your hand in marriage by finding you, whether or not you agree yet.

//

Now, I'm not as familiar with Gaz as I'd like to be (because I got introduced with Ghoap stuff for my entry into the fandom) so please pardon if my characterization is off but I do love him dearly and eat up all content I end up seeing of him.

I'm slightly biased with Gaz being a harpy because I just love the idea of him being a bird of prey like a peregrine falcon (and i think its bluegiragi who has the monster au of him as a harpy?) or a shifter of some sort like a panther or a cheetah (i'm biased towards cheetah actually, because I love the pictures/videos of cheetahs getting emotional support golden retrievers).

Since my idea for this isn't EITHER of those options, please consider reader putting spike traps on the roof for a bird Gaz like stores put up on their signs. He gets real angry about it for a couple days and then figures out exactly how/where to land so he can perch on your roof anyway, scaring the shit out of you when he's just sitting there, chin in his hands, with a shit eating grin when you go to make sure everything's alright on the roof.

Anyway, for this I'm actually thinking fae Gaz - he's been living amongst humans for as long as he can really remember. He's not a changeling, but his mum was fae and she loved his dad. He's visited the fae realm once or twice (and, as convincing as his mum is when he visits her, he nearly forgets about the time dissonance every single visit - none are as bad as the first time, when he had no clue about it, and ended up being gone for fifty years.)

He's sent to greet you when Ghost majestically fails, and Cap'n doesn't quite want to set Soap loose on the poor reader (yet). Ends up falling in love with how clever you are, soft hands slipping into gloves as you pile leaves over the thin nets over the punji pits and bear traps. He's military trained across multiple decades, he's seen all kinds of war (even though he's still relatively young in comparison - he stopped physically aging somewhere in his twenties, but he's barely been alive for like, fifty years) and he's seen all kinds of tricks.

He watches you pour over old books that you've either scavenged or already had, learning how to make simple, but effective traps. The older types of traps are such a clever idea when combined with new ones. The type doesn't matter much to zombies, but the combination of different types will keep humans (and others) on their guard.

He really really really intends to talk to you, instead of lingering in the shadows like a creep.

You end up seeing him, and through sheer luck (or wit, Gaz isn't honestly sure) when he asks that you give him your name, you say; "Give me your name first."

He's stuck at that one, because Gaz has spent years talking around subjects but this pretty little human just points a shotgun at him and demands his attention. He can't even think to talk around the reason he's there when he changes the subject awkwardly, and you insist on his name.

He can't give you his name, his power, not even his nickname, so it ends with him awkwardly leaving.

He's the absolute butt of the joke when he gets back to base after slipping into the trees (so embarrassed that he doesn't take the time to make sure you can't see him do it) and goes straight back to base utilizing a mushroom circle and the sheer willpower to not get distracted as he slips between realms. Makes a week long trek into an hour's worth of walking.

When he returns, he knocks politely, eyeing the newly replaced doorknob.

When he touches it, out of curiosity, he's gobsmacked to find out you've either found a new knob, or cast the old one in cold iron. He touches it three full times in complete disbelief, watches the skin on his hands grow irritated and blister.

You smirk when you open the door, make some shitty joke that he's pretty sure is a twilight reference that would make Ghost furious, and then you tell him you figured it out pretty quickly.

In comparison to Ghost and Soap, his romance is altogether extremely easy - he just keeps visiting every single day, calls you a nickname when you won't give him an actual answer.

He admires your caution, and falls just a little more in love when you call him something stupid like mushroom man.

In the end, what ends up convincing reader, I think, is that he fully gives them his name. It's akin to a proposal, and Gaz isn't quite sure how he feels when you don't realize it as you roll his name - Kyle Garrick on your tongue, testing it. You ask if you can keep calling him Mushie Man and some other stupid nickname and he laughs, presses a kiss to your temple for it. Says it's only fitting, and whispers your full name like a prayer.

He lets you stay in your home a little longer, as long as you need really, laces a misdirection hex into the branches that'll really only work on humans. He comes by every day, no matter what.

When you finally agree, he grabs your face and kisses you like you've given him the sun and stars and hung the moon just to illuminate his way.

//

For Price, I'm going to say dragon price because mmmm hot. Anyway I like to think it's a little bit of everything.

Ghost is the first - you find out really quickly that he fucking hates the counting trick you pull, so you're sure to carry a pocket full of something small just to piss him off if he gets too close. When you don't make eye contact (whether intentional or because you hate it) he's absolutely bewildered that this Soft Little Thing in the woods has so effectively blocked him from getting his job done initially that when he complains to Price, he puts his foot down. Says if Price thinks is so funny, he should send Johnny or Gaz out, see if they can do better.

And Price, sides hurting from laughing so much, agrees to make it Soap's problem next.

Soap returns, a net-like burn across his forearm from where you'd thrown tied together necklace chains at him. He's pissed, whines and moans for hours about how bad it hurts, and Price just snorts and tells him Shouldn't have tried to drag them out, then.

When intimidation and brute force don't work, Price lets Gaz have a go at it.

The man is practically radiating smugness as he goes to win, and Price is crying with laughter when Gaz comes back, his hands blistered and pride bruised. He clears his throat and says I think ah, I think they've just gone ahead and put every guard on the house they can think of. He does not tell anyone that the human ended up catching him in a net for half an hour afterwards, chiding him for the full thirty minutes about trying to open someone's door without asking.

(But Price knows.)

He ends up saying he's going to go deal with it himself to "Show them how it's done."

Really though, he's absolutely smitten with the idea of you. He knows that, given the time and will, his boys would absolutely bring you back - but he doesn't want that anymore. He has to see for himself the cute soft little human in the woods that's managed to catch all three of his best soldiers off guard because all three of them underestimated you.

He can't very well let anyone on base know (especially the civilians) what he is, so he waits until the dead of night to start flying - only does so when he's well past the point of being seen, even if it means he has to fly in his hybrid form, which is a little awkward when he doesn't do it as often.

He's a perfect gentleman when he walks up to your home at daybreak, letting his form go back to human.

He avoids every trap, tripwire, and camera that Simon and Johnny and Kyle had all warned him about so you don't have to spend your precious time and energy fixing them. He knocks on the door and waits until you open it, introduces himself as Captain John Price, love.

Apologies for the heavy handed attempts of his men as he stands on your doorstep. When you slam the door in his face he simply sighs and knocks again. And again, and again, until you finally relent and open the door back up.

He smiles, and asks if he can come in - you say no, and he smiles.

Love, if I wanted to I could push past you, I'm asking to be polite.

You freeze at that, trying to think, trying to evaluate. You're clever, he thinks with a pleased hum, half lidded eyes staring down at you. You sigh, and relent, finally - knowing that whatever battle that you'd be fighting uphill could at least be done over the breakfast you were starting to cook, and you didn't want to waste it.

Something twinges in John's chest as he sits at the table, and decides, like the rotten, greedy bastard he knows he is, that you're his. And not his like the rest of the people he's got, but his. You'll be his, no matter how long it takes him.

He lets you cook in silence, enjoying the mundane domesticity of it all, tucks into the plate of food gratefully, and feels like he's home.

After breakfast, John takes the time to ask you questions. About your past, about your hobbies outside of survival, how many things you've got that'll be coming with. When you remind him you haven't agreed, he chuckles and smooths a hand over your hair and reminds you that he hasn't asked.

You finally ask him what he is, and he blows a mote of smoke at you, watches the realization hit you before you go blank. A fucking dragon? You ask.

A fucking dragon, he responds.

John is extremely amused when you tell him to wait on the doorstep, and you go upstairs for something. When you come back down, you hand him a box full of jewelry (he almost laughs when he notices the amount of silver chains missing.)

He hands you the box back and curls a finger beneath your chin, calls you a silly girl/boy/pet and tells you that not all the stories are true. In this case, they are, of course- but he doesn't need to tell you that he hoards people, not things. That his hoard is every single person on base - doesn't tell you that his most treasured parts of his hoard are the three strong men who work directly with him, that he intends to keep them for as long as he lives, which will still be a damn long time coming, even if he's been around since before the middle ages.

You'll be his favorite of all though, he thinks.

He gives you a week, but tells you that his boys will keep an eye on you, make sure you're still there every day until he personally comes to escort you home. When you remind him, stubbornly, you are home, he laughs, and presses a kiss to your forehead while you stand there, bewildered.

In between that moment, and when you get back to base with him, I can't decide if its better if he ends up singlehandedly destroying a small horde of zombies with fire breath as the pits you've got full of traps fill up, or if it's better if he shows up with a box truck and a few men and they all end up moving you out of the house without asking. Maybe it's a mix of both - you decide!

But regardless, it ends exactly as he wants - you, tucked up into his lap as he reads reports and issues orders. He skips the dating and goes straight into being your husband - makes some sort of quip about being far too old (fashioned) to entertain the thought and goes straight to being married like "it used to be." Even though for a dragon he's still kinda young, hasn't even hit his comparative forties yet, actually. Even though it doesn't really matter, because as far as he's aware dragons don't die of old age so much as they die of other factors beyond their control. It's why he's so carefully cultivated his life towards survival thus far.

John lets you do whatever you want to keep you busy, the only real stipulation is that you come home to him at the end of the day. He's even quite respectful, really. He never touches you without your consent, aside from placing soft kisses on your temple or forehead, or cuddling up to you in your shared bed. (Which you say you only entertain because he's warm, and there's no heating in his room. But really, you love it when he holds you, and lets you hold him with no questions asked, all under the pretense of being half-asleep.)

He acts like he has all the time in the world for you to come around - and he does.

You'll be awfully sore later when you realize he's bound your life to his, even angrier when your teeth adjust and you can start seeing better. He'll pretend not to notice the changes at first to see what you think, and then he'll help you through all of them, cooing and sighing and rubbing into sore muscles as you learn how to control changing into your half-dragon form. Maybe in a couple hundred years you'll figure out how to fully transform into a dragon - maybe not.

[sketchehm]

Some mafia au before I got to bed cause this had been on my mind for lil

I was thinking about the "serpias is sapnap's guard dog" thing and while this isn't exactly that, it's aligned with it though! Hope you enjoy my crude 1am writing lmao

Sapnap has always been the one to first defend his family. When no one would step in to defend their Don's name, it would be him.

(He guesses that should've been a clue in)

He knew he was loyal to a fault, but it was just as natural as breathing. Something he never quite noticed in himself how quickly and strongly he loved, especially those in his family. How easy it was for him to defend everyone around him. Regardless of any pain he might endure(he knows he messed up quite a few buisness dealings when the other would bad mouth Dream or George. He just couldn't help it.)

But when it came to defending himself, sure he can put up a few punches, shoot a gun, break some legs when it came to it, but the bad mouthing? He just kinda lets it go through him. He has his anxieties but he's confident enough in himself and trusts the people he loves to always reassure him if it came to it.

That being said though, there are always exceptions. Dealing with snide mafiosos means hearing rumors about yourself. Dealing with criminals means enemies. Enemies who don't wanna fight face to face, and instead let their words travel through the street rats until it's all you hear when just stepping a foot outside.

Sapnap knows George and Dream deal with it way better than himself. Sapnap is always defending Dream and George. He'll shoot anyone, no second thoughts if it wouldn't cause Dream a headache later on. (He's heard more than enough times from Dream and George how they /needed/ that guy. A few words is not a gun, it can't kill him, just let it lie...)

It's probably one of the most annoying aspects that Sapnap can't ever seem to get over.

So when Team Mafia are pleased with his......training.....they finally allow him to go on his first buisness dealing with Serpias. And he isn't suprised the same kind of shit conversations of tip toeing around one another and throwing subtle insults at each other while trying to negotiate better terms are happening here too. Just in Spanish. At least, he thinks its the same thing. He hears a lot of the new curse words the Team have taught him (and is desperately trying to hold back from giggling at the memories). Though the air is way mire tense than the jovial back and forth him and the other Team members would have with him. He wonders if Serpias is doing alright. He feels useless, can't barely understand what's happening besides knowing it's some sort of arms deal. He just stands quietly behind Serpias trying not to fidget and sigh and whine. He's full of energy. (Fuck maybe he is just some sort of anxious dog....)

It isn't until Serpias groans that Sapnap snaps to and tries to pay attention a little more. The yelling between the two is getting louder and Sapnap is ready to jump into action, feeling strung up. He really didn't expect some sort of fight to happen for his first outing, Serpias said this was gonna be quick and easy. Something to practice learning Spanish if anything.

"Sapni, ven aqui."

Sapnap knows that command well. He quickly goes besides Serpias, looking down and seeing all the documents they have spread across the table. It's all in Spanish. Fuck why did Serpias even call him over.....

The guy on the other side huffs in amusement staring down sapnap. He says something to Serpias and all he can understand is "perro". He can see Serpias tense up. The guy is probably calling Sapnap a bitch he assumes. Not anything new for him really. He would justlike to get out of here ASAP.

"Sapni, ah, you said your math is good yes? Can you check?"

Serpias is handing him a couple of papers. Sure enough it's full of numbers. It's different pricing for different kinds of guns, ones he's familiar with too, he's done this kind of trading before.

He takes a minute and realize the numbers are way off after a bit. Was the guy trying to scam Serpias? He's nervous to say something. Fuck what if he pisses this guy off and then the Team get upset at him for losing a dealer? He wanted this to be a good time out....and he'd come back and all of them would be proud (despite him knowing he wouldn't have done anything) he's starting to like the easy praise he's been getting....

"Umm. Uh. Its...the prices are different here and here. I...there's something..." fuck he's nervous. He can barely get his words out.......fuckkkk he's never like this what's wrong with him?

The guy on the other side laughs at his stuttering. He's embarrassed more now...Serpias is probably gonna be upset at him later, who knows....(Serpias has never been upset at him before. In fact he probably coddles Sapnap a bit too much if he says so himself....but he isn't complaining....)

Serpias is glaring at the guy. They're arguing again.

"Sapni." Serpias says it suddenly, sternly, not taking his eyes of the other man, "the numbers wrong?"

"Yes." His voice cracks. He's so uncool what the fuck.

The arguing gets louder. The man on the other side suddenly gets up and Sapnap’s hand goes to rest on his gun. Fuck, maybe this is part of training too....maybe Serpias knew this was gonna happen.

The guy stares at him for a moment then laughs again.

"You aren't going to kill me."

The guys English is clear. Barely any hint of an accent and it startles him. It's nothing like what he's been surrounded by recently. Fuck now he actually has to speak to this fucker.

Serpias stands up and starts yelling at the guy again, but the guy is focused on Sapnap.

"I know you. You're from the Dream family. You bring borrowed or something now? The fuck you messing with my deals, this isn't your territory."

Serpias has quited down and is watching him. Man this probably /is/ training....

Sapnap looks at Serpias and he nods, allowing him to speak.

The guy snorts, "Ah, so you are the new dog. What Dream kick ya out or something?"

"I've joined Team Mafia on my own will. Dream has nothing to do with this deal." His voice is firmer now. Serious. He's done plenty of deals and trades, this is coming back to him naturally.

"Ohh fucked right off like I heard the others doing too, yea? Probably left them a mess like the rest of them. You'll probably try and steal from these guys too heh? Good luck with that, they'll snap you head right off!" The guy ending with a chuckle. Sapnap does NOT miss dealing with these people. His words are uncomfortable for Sapnap. He hasn't had to think about the betrayals for a while now. Fuck this guy, honestly.

Serpias is still watching, waiting.

"My loyalty is with Team Mafia. Can we get back on track with this? I know the pricing you have listed for required taxing is wrong. You have it multiplied by triple the amount than what you have written." He may have been a bit too snappy with that... and Sapnap knows he pushed it when he sees the guys face fill with anger.

"You have no fucking right to speak like that to me, /perro/. So don't fucking telling me what is or isn't right or wrong on my deals. You have no /say/. Especially not as a /traitor/." The guy has walk around the table and is now face to face with Sapnap. His breathe reeks.

"So let your /handler/ and I talk and you be a good dog and just wait by his side."

The guy yanks him by his coat and pulls Sapnap even closer to him, "/Got it/?"

Sapnap is about to push the guy off before he hears a click.

"No toques a mi Sapni."

Serpias is growling.

The guy barely turns his head towards Serpias, before there's a hole in it.

Sapnap's ears are ringing and he's on the ground, covered in blood that isn't his own.

Serpias is by him in a second. He sits next to Sapnap and pulls him close, hugging him and has Sapnap's face rest on his shoulder, basically tucked im his neck. He waits for the ringing to subside. Serpias is petting his hair. Sapnap thinks about the blood he's staining on Serpias. (Though Serpias is covered in blood as well.)

He can hear Serpias talking to him. His voice is soft as he continues to pet his hair. Sapnap is so confused.

It only takes a couple of minutes before the ringing has subsided, but Sapnap refuses to move away from Serpias. It's....Nice. He thinks about what the /fuck/ just happened. It isn't until the blood on him starts to get uncomfortable that he finally pushes away.

"Casa?" Sapnap wants to shower.

Serpias will laugh and helps him up.

Sapnap wonders if he failed training today.....